I was recently in the ladies room of a restaurant here in my city. I was on a date with my love. The location is not important. Nor is the time of year. Or the type of establishment. But, if you know me or my man, it was not a chain or a place where the menu is laminated.
I was washing my hands. A trans woman walked into the bathroom and we made eye contact. I smiled at her. She smiled at me. While she made her way into the room, she complimented my dress. I thanked her and genuinely complimented her earrings, which were fabulous.
As women often do, we formed an immediate bond over our shared love of fashion. We briefly compared notes on where we had sourced the dress and the earrings. Then she walked to a stall and I left the restroom to return to my table.
That was the entire interaction. It’s the same as hundreds of other interactions I’ve had with other cis and trans women my whole life.
Sometimes, my kids have been present for these interactions. There’s no change in the level of kindness and acceptance felt on BOTH sides of the encounter.
Sidebar…It’s rather amazing the bonds of womanhood that are forged in bathrooms, is it not? When someone needs a tampon, the sisterhood’s got you. When you’re feeling low as you look in the mirror, the sisterhood’s got you. When you need just a bit more courage to tell that loser at the bar that you’ve HAD ENOUGH, the sisterhood’s got you. Need a pen/safety pin/cough drop/breath mint? The ladies room is a place of acceptance and love, always.
So I got to thinking about all the times I’ve had a negative interaction with a trans woman in a restroom, or any room, for that matter. Or a negative interaction with a trans man. And the count is zero, zilch, nada.
Now, let’s do that same calculation with cis men.
Dear readers, cis men have been harassing me since I was 12.
So yeah, the trans women in the ladies room are all good in my book. Always.
The end.
